I Just Don't Have The Words

I've been meaning to tell you about all the wonderful adventures I'm having despite this nasty cold that just won't go away even though I'm taking a multi-vitamin and echinacea pill every morning with my glass of orange juice that has lemon slices floating in it. But I just can't do it. I even have photos! Yes, I have photos of when Matt and I decided to take full advantage of the beautiful weather yesterday and take a twenty minute bus ride to the village of St. Jacobs. I want to tell you how much fun I had in the markets (open-air AND indoor) that I didn't even notice when three hours had passed or that the sun was indeed burning my shoulders and back so that I would later have to slather Vaseline on them.

I want to tell you stories from when I go out with my friends, how we go dancing and how she made out this guy and how his friend later collected all of our phone numbers and e-mail addresses and actually e-mailed us a few days later which I thought was funny, but I shouldn't be so mean as to laugh at him - which I did.

I want to tell you about how I've technically got three jobs right now, one that doesn't start for three weeks, but I've been hired already and what's neat is that the other two jobs place me in the Tour Guide role so that I'm calling myself L'il Miss Tour Guide because all I do is give tours of Ottawa or Quebec City or my university campus. I've never owned so many white golf shirts before.

To tell you the truth, I don't really feel like telling you how I've been making tuna salad and eating almost nothing but tuna salad for the last week because I have a giant jar of Miracle Whip that I need to get rid of before the end of this week. Whoops, I just did. The stuff still kind of tastes good (I'm surprised I'm not totally sick of it) but having a stuffy nose helps.

I really don't feel like telling you how I walked all the way to downtown Waterloo to audition for the KW Little Theater only to mess up my monologue by forgetting a huge chunk of it right in the beginning but I was taught to recover well, which I did, but not well enough for them to offer me a part when they called the next day. I was also slightly unwilling to perform on stage in my underwear which seemed to bother one of the casting dudes, but hey - sucks to your assmar. Doug, who was doing the calling, liked me a lot though and sounded disappointed that I wouldn't be in the show but told me to audition in late July and almost guaranteed me a part in his play. I'll see you in July, Doug.

I want to tell you how I walked to Matt's place after my half-crappy audition and I was half-worried that I would get lost or that something bad would happen because it was almost ten at night and it was dark and I was alone - a single female walking alone at night through empty parking lots that still had one red van sitting in them while three guys rode by with their bikes and yelled things is something to kind of worry about I tell you. And as I walked, I thought about how I was about an hour late showing up to his house and whether or not he was concerned at all about where I was - not that I told him where the audition was being held (stupid me) - and that if something DID happen, how would he know? How would anyone know? Would he call my house, go out to look for me, call someone else? How would my family know? Would they tell my friends, or would my friends just figure it out after they tried to reach me for a really long time and couldn't find me? How would any of you know, because my blog would just sit here and my last post would have been about me being sick and stupid MSN conversations.

I want to tell you that I'm leaving town again - this time for about three weeks and though I've survived and enjoyed my time away from this place for two weeks before, the thought of that extra week without my computer and other amenities has me really stressed out. But if deciding what to pack is the most of my worries right now, I've got it pretty easy.

I want to and don't want to tell you all these things but I just can't seem to find the words even though this post took me a real long time to write so that I'm almost late for my campus tour.
10:47 am