Reconnected

I feel the need to tell you that I spent the late afternoon/early evening today with an ex-boyfriend whom I haven't seen in two years and it wasn't very awkward at all. We both had chai lattes and laughed at funny stories about living in residence. He still dresses in black, has thinned down a bit and still does the high pitched voices when imitating other people. His hair is longer and he has a goatee with chin straps. He called me indie and I liked his hat (though I didn't tell him at the time). Glasses, not contacts. I recognized the sweater he wore and when he scratched at his forearm and told me he had dry skin, I thought to myself, I know. We looked each other in the eyes while we talked and listened and referred to the times when we were together. He's a Harry Potter fan now, still gets mail from the National Ballet and has to learn Latin soon.

He is the first person who I ever actually fell in love with and today I was reminded of all the reasons why. It's a strange feeling to realize that two people who loved each other so much in the past will probably never love each other in the same way again, but I think that's the truth in this case (and for a lot of other cases too). The bottom line is that I'm sincerely happy for him and I'm glad that he found someone who makes him smile every morning. I left feeling a bit wistful, wishing that I hadn't hurt him so when we parted, wishing that I didn't have to question why he would ever want to see me again. So to The Powers That Be that brought us together today, thanks.
11:59 pm