Lunchtime Lessons

My co-workers and I sat around the board room table today and had lunch together; we ordered gourmet pizza, someone brought in slices of watermelon and then there were surprise raspberry tarts... all in honor of yours truly leaving her post at the office for the next three and a half months. Gosh I love working with a team of women. Of course, the main topic of conversation was my cycling trip and how preparations were going. One of my biggest challenges, I mentioned, was dealing with my pains in my butt. Despite having invested in padded bike shorts, there are some days when I crriiinge as I settle into my seat. And there's nothing I can do to help myself either - the pain is so internal it feels like I'm just sitting on my bones regardless of how much padding I have, natural or otherwise. The ladies suggested that I have another butter tart or two to help with the extra cushioning.

It's the end of the work day and there I am, riding away from the bike shop where I had just picked up my baby, who had been in to get dolled up (my bike's now been outfitted with fenders, a bike rack, panniers, and a kickstand - and holy crap I can no longer lift her with one hand anymore!). In addition to all this new gear on my bike, I had also decided it was finally time to try on my clip shoes. I had given myself enough time to get used to riding again, and now it was time to amp up my training/learning. I now had extra weight and I thought that I should really learn to wear and use the shoes I paid a dear $150 for.

The one time I tried them was in the store when I was getting fitted to my bike (rather, I suppose the bike was being fitted to *me* - there's nothing like having stuff customized to suit you perfectly) and clipping in and out was difficult. With the number of red lights and the amount of stopping I do when I'm riding in the city, I thought that it would be useless to have these shoes, but then again, I was going on a long distance trip... Anyway, I didn't think it could be that bad. I mean, I had talked to numerous people in good detail about using the shoes and I had recently rode behind someone for about an hour and watched as he constantly clipped in an out - it didn't look *that* hard. So I strapped myself into the shoes, rode slowly around the block and kept clipping in and out to get the hang of it. And like I thought - it wasn't *that* bad.

Perhaps it wasn't a very smart idea to combine learning two things at once - what it's like to ride with clip shoes AND weight/panniers. Because when I got to a stop light at the end of my spin around the block, I had managed to unclip my right foot (good!) which is all I've ever needed to stop at a light in the past, but (and here's where the 2-in-1 learning combo was a bad thing) I guess the weight in my panniers wasn't exactly even (not good) and my mind kind of freaked out because it's not used to having my left foot attached to the bike (also not good). So in a moment of split-second panic I tried to unclip my left foot and in doing so totally threw off my balance (bad) and simply toppled over (bad!) into the street (very bad!). I landed with a thud and clangs and the girl who had stopped in front of me spun around to find me lying in the middle of the road (very, very bad!) with my bike half on top of me. At least my left foot had come unclipped in the falling process (not bad at all).

A bit horrified, she asked, "Are you okay?!" I was fine. I picked myself up, got the bike upright again and all I had to say was, "New clip shoes." She understood and gave me some encouraging words as she pedaled away (so did the man who saw me fall as he was crossing the street - oh, public embarrassment). I was happy with one thing though: I laughed about it. I chuckled and smiled and really, genuinely laughed about my spill for at least another block. The idea of falling off a bike is definitely worse than the actual fall itself. Oh don't get me wrong, my left elbow and left ass cheek are sore as heck from taking all my weight onto the pavement, but I'm not seriously injured or anything. Let me say though, that I was super, SUPER lucky that there was no car in the lane next to me! I would have fallen right into the passenger side window and slid down the side of the car with my bike still attached to me (that would have been very, VERY bad).

The rest of my evening ride went along without incident. I practiced clipping and unclipping some more and I'm slowly getting the hang of it. I also noticed that I definitely move slower now that I've got a few extra kilos on me.

The funny thing was though, I fell again as I pulled up to my apartment building at the end of the evening. It was the same right foot free, mind wanting the left foot free too, sudden knee-jerk reaction and the slow-mo topple onto my left side. That's probably the worst part: when you KNOW you're about to fall, but there's absolutely nothing you can do about it except watch yourself. This time, no one asked if I was okay - not even the couple who were loading their car right beside me. And this time I'm only kind of okay - my elbow is going to bruise big time for sure, and my left ass cheek is red and really, really sore. Like, I'm ready to limp sore.

Maybe I should have taken the ladies advice at lunch and eaten a few more raspberry tarts.
11:46 pm

Monday, July 26, 2010

Progress Report

Hardware/'big' stuff
- bike rack, panniers (about 50L capacity), fenders
- bike multi-tool, tire patch/repair kit, small pump, extra set of tire tubes and spokes, chain lube and rag, bungee cables
- compact sleeping bag and sleeping mat, small pillow
- compression sacks (need two more)

'Smaller' gear stuff:
- lights, bike bell, bike mirror
- reflective vest and tape
- short and long fingered bike gloves
- another pair of bike shorts
- rain shoe covers

Not bad, eh?

BUT, my To Do List...
- finish buying bike gear
- book flights to Europe (I leave in two weeks, but not if I don't book anything!)
- pack up and move out
- finish stuff at work
- take my fam on a long weekend road-trip
- keep riding and training!
- do taxes

I shopped all weekend, and tonight too - I am so, soo tired of shopping! And I've spent so much more money than I ever thought was necessary. Biking is an expensive hobby to start up - who knew! Despite all that, I have to go out again tomorrow - I need a good bike rack and fenders and I can't just go to the regular co-op to get those apparently. I can't even get a regular kickstand! My bike is just too special. Specialty (read: expensive) bike shops, here I come. Then I have to conquer my sleeping bag purchase and then I can relax a bit. Actually, I may end up re-thinking my sleeping mat because I went for something that will be cushy and roomy, but at the cost of taking up extra space and adding more weight to my load. Can't wait to pack my panniers and go on my first ride with a full load on!

11:00 pm

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Adventure Lies Ahead

In an effort to NOT TALK ABOUT IT I'm going to tell you about my new, upcoming adventure. This is an email that I sent to friends, family, colleagues, etc. to let them know what was up with me lately:


Hello hello to those near and dear...

Hi!

I'm writing to say hello, but I'm also writing because I am embarking on a new adventure soon and thought you might be interested in hearing about it! I am still working at the student travel company managing a team of tour leaders (a job that I am so lucky to have because I love it), but am taking some time off in the fall to pursue a little project (detailed below). The message below is a bit long, but I’d love it if you read on when you’ve got a few spare minutes!

I just got accepted into a program that I think will be my coolest endeavour yet: an Otesha cycling and performing tour. For those who haven’t heard of it, Otesha is a charitable organization that brings people together to form a mobile community (on bicycles!) to promote a sustainable lifestyle and earth-friendly choices to youth via performances and workshops at schools and community centers. They’re also really into biking, which is where I come in.

In a couple months’ time I will be embarking on what I’m sure will be a life altering experience, for myself and hopefully for others that will be touched by this program. I am joining The Otesha Project on their 2-month Highlands & Islands bike trip around the Maritimes – cycling 2,000km from Fredericton, through New Brunswick, all around Prince Edward Island and through Nova Scotia to end in Halifax from September 7th to November 2nd. Yowza!

Visit the Otesha site to check out our tour so far (scroll down to Highlands & Islands). You can see our route, the cities we’ll be visiting and when, and bios of the team members are up as well (mine included)! If you know of anyone in the area that would be interested in having the Otesha team visit, you can fill out a form to request our presence!

I have begun preparations – though it was a bit slow going since it was our busy travel season! I purchased a new road bike (mine is a very nice feminine white and pink, not black - gotta love merchandising for women), a new helmet (also with pink stripes), fancy bike shoes that clip into my pedals, padded bike shorts, a bike computer (to track times and distances), and some rain gear (waterproof jacket and pants) since I expect that it will get a bit wet during our rides. Luckily, everything purchased so far has either been on sale, I’ve found coupons for them, or they were really fair prices - phew! The list seems long, but there is still so much more to go! I am still shopping for a sleeping bag and mat, a bike rack and panniers/saddle bags, reflective gear, bike gloves, shoe covers, and even simple things like a bell, and lights for late-evening rides. The list goes on! And a physical training-program has just started…!

A few weeks ago, an Otesha trip came through Toronto (the Ferocious Farm tour) and I went to see the performance that I would be doing myself in a couple months’ time. I was thrilled to see the play that I will be performing in myself (it’s wonderful! charming, funny, and full of good messages). I met team members, checked out their bikes and gear, and picked their brains on what the journey has been like so far. I finally had the answer to the question I had been asking myself for months, “What have I gotten myself into?!” The answer is: Something simply amazing.

It is quite the undertaking and I will admit that I am both slightly terrified and totally psyched for what is to come. I am about one-third of the way through my required gear list and have yet to start fundraising to meet my goal of $2,250. All the work I have done has been in the background up until now, and I have been building up the courage (and time) to reach out and ask for some support.

I truly and whole-heartedly believe in what I will be doing with Otesha. Living on a bicycle for two months, riding around to visit schools to do performances and host workshops with students, encouraging them to make responsible choices and take care of the earth. We will be promoting a very simple, grassroots kind of lifestyle – I am excited to really practice what I preach and set an example for others, but most importantly, for myself.

If you support these ideas, or just support *me* in supporting these ideas, then I would ask that you please consider donating to my Otesha Journey...(insert info on how to donate here).

As always, thank you for all your support in my wacky endeavours (past, present, and future!). It is much, much appreciated.


So that's that. I never thought I'd ever find such a quirky combination of random things I love in life. I mean, I've always wanted to go on a performance tour because it's been two years since I've been on stage and I miss it. So to find a performance tour about sustainability that goes around on bicycles just about put me over the moon. For years I told people that I wanted to get into "environmental education" one day, not really knowing what a job in that non-existent field would look like. And now I found something that brought that phrase to life. It's right up my alley.

Work is, in a word, WONDERFUL (and also UNBELIEVABLE) because they are
1. letting me go
2. letting me come back when I'm done
3. donating $2,000 to my project contribution (and thus I went above and beyond my goal of $2,250 because otherwise? I don't think I could have).
Seriously, I found a job that lets me do stuff I really like, gives me 5 weeks of holiday every summer, and then lets me take off for 2 months in the Fall to bike around the east coast of Canada? UNREAL. I am a lucky, lucky ass biatch.

So I no longer need to worry about fundraising, which is a ginormous stress off my shoulders. Now I just need to worry about getting the rest of my gear together. If anyone has cyclist friends who have stuff to sell or donate, please get me in touch with them! I am still looking for:

Hardware/'big' stuff
- bike rack, panniers (about 50L capaccity), fenders
- bike multi-tool, tire patch/repair kit, small pump, extra set of tire tubes and spokes, chain lube and rag, bungee cables
- compact sleeping bag and sleeping mat, small pillow
- compression sacks

'Smaller' gear stuff:
- lights, bike bell, bike mirror
- reflective vest and tape
- short and long fingered bike gloves
- another pair of bike shorts
- rain shoe covers

...and an accountant - I still haven't done my taxes.

8:50 pm

Monday, July 12, 2010

Uhm, Bummed

I don't know how else to explain it.

I don't know what's gotten into me - or out of me, for that matter. It's like something in my head just got up and left me one morning, leaving my mind voiceless to this blog that I've kept bits and pieces of my life in for seven years. It's not like my life took a dramatic change and I didn't feel like talking about it to anyone. It's not like I didn't desire to keep writing and sharing here or that I ran out of things to talk about. My life may not have taken a great turn in any direction, but I'll always have something to talk about, trust me. Sometimes it just feels like that sleep I wrote about needing in October of last year when I came back from Paris was just a really, really long nap. So I entitled that one post in February the way I did, to try and prove a point to my brain that I indeed have woken up from said nap. I guess it was more like I rolled over to hit the snooze button.

Either way, I'm here. And what I have to say...well, I just I don't know if it'll be any good. But I'm saying it anyway.

It feels funny - to suddenly go so long without something that you once held very dear to you, and central to your being. I thought about it all the time (the fact that I wasn't writing here anymore and still really wanted to) - every day in fact, but didn't do anything about it. That's not true. I did try. Periodically, I'd get a good idea for a post and bookmark it in my head for later when I had some time at the computer. I'd open up a fresh, clean text box and after typing a few words... nothing. I just sat there with my hands off the keyboard, stared at the screen and sighed. I suppose it's kind of like breaking up. You've got something every day for a handful, or two, of years and then it just kind of... stops. Slowly. It leaves you or you leave it, but either way, something goes a-way. And you're kind of watching it crumble right before your eyes, and you know you can't really stop it so you sit there with your hands at your sides and just ...stare. You don't know how you're going to continue on without it, but somehow, you just do.

Gee, sounds like I suffered another heart injury and I'm back to my old self, doesn't it? I do mean to talk about the blog - and how not having it, not actively engaging with it for the past many months, resembles a broken relationship that I'm still unearthing myself from.

The funny thing about this one is that it WON'T GO AWAY. And it's been bugging me since January - that's SIX MONTHS, PEOPLE. I get that it always takes me some time - moreso than the average bear - but my gahd, I'm starting to either seriously question the Universe on why the hell it's f-ing with me AGAIN, or just straight up question my mental and emotional health and general well-being. Because this? This wasn't an episode of I've-been-in-love-with-the-guy-for-ten-years and it wasn't like the time I wanted to marry him but then he went and swallowed two bottles of Aspirin. This? Was a classic example of why two awesome kids who are into each other but live an ocean apart can't make it work. It's a story of a girl and a boy who spent six months learning about each other over the phone and free VOIP software and spent the few moments they did have in person tangled up in each other's arms and legs and tongues and clear-sky eyes and crooked smiles only to realize it was all for naught in the end. It's a story of utter heartach- nay, DREAMache because this time? I really thought I was so close.

But COME ON. I knew it wasn't going to work from the get-go. I was skeptical and sarcastic about it - heck, I thought I even tried to hold back a bit (mission unsuccessful, but still, the idea was there) and that's a big sign that I was trying to keep it casual. So this is why I'm crazy: I kept saying that it probably wasn't going to work out, and then it didn't work out. I was right and now I'm sad.

Big deal. Get a grip, woman!

While I'm here ranting, I will also admit these other things:
- I miss him. A lot. It hurts.
- I wonder what his purpose in my life was
- Did he somehow, in some way, affect my not writing on this blog for such a long period? If so, WHY?!
- I've noticed that every time something bad-boy-related happens, I feel better after I write about it a few times and let the whine out. Will I start to feel better after this?

Also - Merry Christmas, Happy 2010, I'm going on a two-month bike trip soon, I turned 26, yay summer is here(!), an- ohmygod. MY TAXES. Shit!

10:36 pm